i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
why do cheetos always look like penises
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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