I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
