God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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