watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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