I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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