the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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