so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
