I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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