Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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