Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
