i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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