the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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