so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
