i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
