Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
