If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
