who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I wish you could order shots online.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
