as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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