so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
