I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize