hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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