All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
