dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
