i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you would pick up someone in the library
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
