Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I came so hard my ears popped.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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