she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
