He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
