It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
