am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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