so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
