I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
