I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
