When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
In America we eat man semen.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
