Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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