i can't believe i had my finger in that
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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