i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
