Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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