He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
