Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
