Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize