Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I bet he comes in French.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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