Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
The police scanner is talking about you again....
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
