I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
