my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
