Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
