I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
