office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Randomize
