you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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