david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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