I can tuck mytits in my pants
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
